thegrlnxtdoorandhergingerfriend:
My AP euro teacher wouldn’t let our class watch Les Mis so we barricaded the door and screamed “VIVE LA REVOLUCIÓN” when he tried to get in.
reading fanfic is so stressful cos no matter how great a fic is there is always something that doesn’t fit in with your headcanon and then you have to pretend you didn’t just read that sentence
Hey! Did you know:
- sex is okay
- so is masturbation
- watching porn won’t make you impure
- one night stands are okay too
- having sex with multiple people doesn’t make you a slut
- even 3-somes or group sex and orgies are a-okay
- sex with the same gender is alright
- not having sex doesn’t make you a prude
- your body your choice no matter your gender
- shaming other people for who they have sex with, how much they have sex, and even their kinks make you NOT okay!
dear fucking tumblr
this is a fucking bumblebee
this is a fucking bee
this is a fucking hornet
this is a fucking wasp
as you can fucking see the longer their legs are and the less fuzzy they are is equivalent to how fucking evil they fucking are
ITS TRANSPARENT REBLOG IT
There’s an elephant walking on my blog.
omg so cool
q’d, in thailand ☼
o m g
After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany her on her trips to Sainsbury’s. Unfortunately, like most men, I found shopping boring and preferred to get in and get out. Equally unfortunate, my wife is like most women - she loves to browse.
Yesterday my dear wife received the following letter from the local Sainsbury’s…
Dear Mrs. Harris,
Over the past six months, your husband has caused quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behaviour and have been forced to ban both of you from the store. Our complaints against your husband, Mr. Harris, are listed below and are “documented by our video
surveillance cameras”:
1. June 15: He took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in other people’s carts when they weren’t looking.
2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-
minute intervals.
3. July 7: He made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the women’s restroom.
4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official
voice, ‘Code 3 in Housewares. Get on it right away’. This caused the employee to leave her assigned station and receive a reprimand from her Supervisor that in turn resulted with a union grievance, causing management to lose time and costing the company money.
5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to reserve a bag of Maltesers.
6. August 14: Moved a ‘CAUTION - WET FLOOR’ sign to a carpeted area.
7. August 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told the children shoppers they could come in if they would bring pillows and blankets from the bedding department - to which twenty children obliged.
8. August 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began
crying and screamed, ‘Why can’t you people just leave me alone?’Emergency Medics were called.
9. September 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a mirror while he picked his nose.
10. September 10: While handling guns in the Sports department, he asked the clerk where the antidepressants were.
11. October 3: Darted around the Store suspiciously while loudly
humming the ’ Mission Impossible’ theme.
12. October 6: In the auto department, he practiced his ‘Madonna look’ by using different sizes of funnels.
13. October 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed
through, yelled ‘PICK ME! PICK ME!’
14. October 22: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumed the fetal position and screamed ‘OH NO! IT’S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!’
15. Took a box of condoms to the checkout clerk and asked where the fitting room was.
And last, but not least:
16. October 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited
awhile, and then yelled very loudly, ‘Hey! There’s no toilet paper in here.’
One of the Staff passed out.
Whatever happens next saturday, we’ll be there with you whovians.
thanks you guys. *cries into shoulder*
